Burnt
when i was married, i wore a wedding ring (DUH) i was waiting tables, and got some sort of rash or skin irritation or something, anyway, the dr told me to keep it dry *the ring, and my finger* and clean, and let it breathe...but still, it got to the point where just putting my ring on,would make my skin feel like it was burning...now, however much time has past, & i got out of the shower the other day, and was putting on lotion, and noticed i still have a red line or almost ring on my finger...how is that possible? I haven't worn that ring in what, almost 2 years? but it's interesting to me, because i thought i was totally closed and wrapped up, and sealed, and finished with that entire part of my life, and everything was all scarred over, and good to go, but it turns out, i bear the burn of that time not only inside me, but outside also...i still find myself rubbing my finger with my thumb the way i used to when my ring would turn itself on my hand and i would have to fix it. i feel so free not to be wearing it anymore, but i also feel burned...
you know what's funny about God? you will be going along, pretty content with your relationship with Him, thinkin you are doing well, no big issues, kinda on cruise control, and then WHAM!! out of nowhere, you hit the largest, bloodiest, most gory deer in the road that completely totals your car, and makes you stop...and you suddenly realize, if i don't fix this car, i will LITTERALLY never be able to go anywhere, not only that, but if i don't get this fixed, i will never have the ability or privilege to take anyone else anywhere...it's kinda funny, because it's never this beautiful moment where angles chime in, and God speaks to you while you are all glammed up on your way to wherever, it started for me when i was in the shower, and for the first time since john actually seriously thought about marriage in a capacity that would involve me, and i about died...it was at that moment, with mascara running down my face, and wet hair that i realized, oh crap, i think i just totaled my car....
you know what's funny about God? you will be going along, pretty content with your relationship with Him, thinkin you are doing well, no big issues, kinda on cruise control, and then WHAM!! out of nowhere, you hit the largest, bloodiest, most gory deer in the road that completely totals your car, and makes you stop...and you suddenly realize, if i don't fix this car, i will LITTERALLY never be able to go anywhere, not only that, but if i don't get this fixed, i will never have the ability or privilege to take anyone else anywhere...it's kinda funny, because it's never this beautiful moment where angles chime in, and God speaks to you while you are all glammed up on your way to wherever, it started for me when i was in the shower, and for the first time since john actually seriously thought about marriage in a capacity that would involve me, and i about died...it was at that moment, with mascara running down my face, and wet hair that i realized, oh crap, i think i just totaled my car....
This entry was posted by .: Amanda :.
on Sunday, April 23, 2006 at 2:11 AM.
You can skip to the end and leave a response.
» Post a Comment