mrs. s
people who believe themselves to be better than others annoy me.
no, annoy is vague, too easy to dismiss. some days i can blow off the ignorance and general lack of intelligence and chalk it up to a certain amount of arrogance all humans posses. however, some days i read, or hear, or run into a special breed of people. they are the people who believe that the rules of the world do not apply to them. these are the people who refuse to see their own faults, and cannot comprehend anything but their own perfection. it is so frustrating to be completely able to defend yourself and those you love, and yet to choose not to. i ran into a very arrogant woman. a woman who i am acquainted with because of similar circles that we were involved in many years ago. this woman doesn't know me, or my family. she has never cared to truly know us. to truly get in upto her elbows, and live life with us. yet she presumed to make judgments about us. she in her own religious self-righteous bubble, believes herself better than those i love and identify with most. in her upside down world, your worth as a spiritual being is defined by WHAT YOU DO. amazing. this same woman, whose life is of course perfect has a daughter going through a divorce. when asked about her children, she gave me full updates on all the rest while curiously leaving out the shamed and sinful soon to be divorcee daughter.
if you want to hit my hot button quickly, presume to know and judge someone else's spirituality. if you want to hit my hot button even quicker, bail on those who need you most, and distance yourself from things you don't "approve" of, or things that don't fit your lovely little package called theology.
real life isn't tied up in neat packages. truth doesn't come only when convenient. life is dirty, and muddy, and painful. life is fought in the trenches, and you can consider yourself blessed if you find yourself surrounded by people who truly love you. there are those i would take a bullet for. but in all likelihood, that will never be necessary. what will be necessary is for me to weep with them when they loose parents, to love them through addictions, to encourage them with my words, and to be a safe place to hide out during a storm.
i think the reason that woman, and the other arrogant and willfully ignorant people who come to mind now, make me so mad so fast is that i used to be them. i used to think i had it all together. i thought i was set on my life's course, and i clung to the formulas of Christianity as though they made me right. the more i see of life, and the more i get in up to my elbows with those around me, and truly love them, the more i am convinced that there is something seriously wrong with the way we act out "Christianity".
it seems to me as though Christianity has become synonymous with superiority. as Christians, the last thing we are is superior. we, more so than anyone else should be painfully aware of our own sickness, and the immeasurable cost that results from it. we should be the FIRST to extend grace and kindness. NOT the first to boo and hiss and make harsh statements. why do we feel the need to spread our righteousness? The Bible says it's the KINDNESS of God that brings us to repentance. not the ass whopping He hands out that we absolutely deserve.
i have come to believe that when Jesus said do not give that which is holy to the dogs, and don't cast your pearls before swine, he was not speaking about sinners, or pagans, or whores, or the outcast of society. I have an easier time believing Jesus was talking about those who consider themselves religious. Especially since it seems that Jesus spent more of his time hanging out with hoodlum fisherman, a murderer, an outcast prostitute, and the equivalent of a crooked irs agent. Jesus spent his time speaking to the poor, the lonely, the broken, the smelly, the people who likely swore and were not pure, religious, and articulate. I find that the most difficult people to stomach are those so convinced of their own perfection, that they cannot see how irrelevant and isolated they have become in their own community. i believe that the dogs, or the swine are people like the arrogant, ignorant woman i spoke of earlier. the real swine, the real dogs are those who can say out loud that others are not good enough. how dare we attempt to define who is or is not "good"?
God help us and our arrogance. God help our own willful ignorance, and our obsession with being better than others. Show us our brokenness. Let us remember what messes we are. Let us love others. Let us give of ourselves. Let us be truthful representations of you. Not these horrid knock-offs that somewhere have the word "Christ" stamped on us. That use your name as an excuse to hurt people. Teach us, redefine to us what you would look like in the year 2007. And help us to become those people. Because who we are is hurtful, and life stealing, and a piss-poor representation of Your name.
no, annoy is vague, too easy to dismiss. some days i can blow off the ignorance and general lack of intelligence and chalk it up to a certain amount of arrogance all humans posses. however, some days i read, or hear, or run into a special breed of people. they are the people who believe that the rules of the world do not apply to them. these are the people who refuse to see their own faults, and cannot comprehend anything but their own perfection. it is so frustrating to be completely able to defend yourself and those you love, and yet to choose not to. i ran into a very arrogant woman. a woman who i am acquainted with because of similar circles that we were involved in many years ago. this woman doesn't know me, or my family. she has never cared to truly know us. to truly get in upto her elbows, and live life with us. yet she presumed to make judgments about us. she in her own religious self-righteous bubble, believes herself better than those i love and identify with most. in her upside down world, your worth as a spiritual being is defined by WHAT YOU DO. amazing. this same woman, whose life is of course perfect has a daughter going through a divorce. when asked about her children, she gave me full updates on all the rest while curiously leaving out the shamed and sinful soon to be divorcee daughter.
if you want to hit my hot button quickly, presume to know and judge someone else's spirituality. if you want to hit my hot button even quicker, bail on those who need you most, and distance yourself from things you don't "approve" of, or things that don't fit your lovely little package called theology.
real life isn't tied up in neat packages. truth doesn't come only when convenient. life is dirty, and muddy, and painful. life is fought in the trenches, and you can consider yourself blessed if you find yourself surrounded by people who truly love you. there are those i would take a bullet for. but in all likelihood, that will never be necessary. what will be necessary is for me to weep with them when they loose parents, to love them through addictions, to encourage them with my words, and to be a safe place to hide out during a storm.
i think the reason that woman, and the other arrogant and willfully ignorant people who come to mind now, make me so mad so fast is that i used to be them. i used to think i had it all together. i thought i was set on my life's course, and i clung to the formulas of Christianity as though they made me right. the more i see of life, and the more i get in up to my elbows with those around me, and truly love them, the more i am convinced that there is something seriously wrong with the way we act out "Christianity".
it seems to me as though Christianity has become synonymous with superiority. as Christians, the last thing we are is superior. we, more so than anyone else should be painfully aware of our own sickness, and the immeasurable cost that results from it. we should be the FIRST to extend grace and kindness. NOT the first to boo and hiss and make harsh statements. why do we feel the need to spread our righteousness? The Bible says it's the KINDNESS of God that brings us to repentance. not the ass whopping He hands out that we absolutely deserve.
i have come to believe that when Jesus said do not give that which is holy to the dogs, and don't cast your pearls before swine, he was not speaking about sinners, or pagans, or whores, or the outcast of society. I have an easier time believing Jesus was talking about those who consider themselves religious. Especially since it seems that Jesus spent more of his time hanging out with hoodlum fisherman, a murderer, an outcast prostitute, and the equivalent of a crooked irs agent. Jesus spent his time speaking to the poor, the lonely, the broken, the smelly, the people who likely swore and were not pure, religious, and articulate. I find that the most difficult people to stomach are those so convinced of their own perfection, that they cannot see how irrelevant and isolated they have become in their own community. i believe that the dogs, or the swine are people like the arrogant, ignorant woman i spoke of earlier. the real swine, the real dogs are those who can say out loud that others are not good enough. how dare we attempt to define who is or is not "good"?
God help us and our arrogance. God help our own willful ignorance, and our obsession with being better than others. Show us our brokenness. Let us remember what messes we are. Let us love others. Let us give of ourselves. Let us be truthful representations of you. Not these horrid knock-offs that somewhere have the word "Christ" stamped on us. That use your name as an excuse to hurt people. Teach us, redefine to us what you would look like in the year 2007. And help us to become those people. Because who we are is hurtful, and life stealing, and a piss-poor representation of Your name.
This entry was posted by .: Amanda :.
on Tuesday, October 16, 2007 at 11:49 PM.
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